DO’s and DON’Ts: High school Edition
Judging myself harshly so you don’t have to
Flashback Friday, y’all.
I think we can all learn a thing or two from looking back at the past. I’m no expert on history with the exception of one small part of it, and that’s ME!
I’ve been dressing how I feel (usually like some found object art piece mixed with the christmas section at the dollar store) for nearly 20 years, which is why today I am taking you back to highschool with me to analyze some of my earliest fashion wins and blunders– from homemade plastic dresses to lingerie as daywear. What can we glean from my early style experimentation?
In the spirit of Glamour Magazines past, I bring you DO’s and DON’Ts: High School Edition:
Don’t: I’ve actually always loved this photo, but I’m so distracted by my –honestly really good– DIY dye job that I don’t immediately notice I’m wearing at least 4 necklaces, and one of my mismatched earrings is actually just a bottle cap with a plastic helicopter toy dangling off of it. I practically lived in that skin-tight vintage slip dress that is literally safety pinned onto my body here after I got stuck in it once, and had to cut my way out. If I ignore everything from my eyebrows down, including my crayola-esque makeup job, I can give this look a 3 out of 10– if only for the expertly tied madonna head scarf.
Photo taken at the original location of The Vera Project, Seattle after playing a show with my highschool band. 2004
Don’t: Dressing up in Seattle was always a struggle because the weather is forever the absolute worst. You end up layering things together that make no sense, just to stay both warm and dry. Which only partially explains the clashing powder blue vintage cardigan peeking out of this crazy striped jacket I borrowed from my mom, that makes my shoulders look about as wide as I was long. Honestly, a tophat is a great way to ruin 99.9% of outfits and I think I was aware of that at the time but chose to go for it anyway. Yes, there is a babydoll stuck to my dress. This outfit is a 100% disaster, though my main regret is having broken those earrings about 6 years later…
Photo taken at an anti-war rally at Westlake Center on Valentines Day 2004
Do: I was never a goth, but this picture is making me think I ought to have been? This is an unusually cohesive look for me in my late teens. I’m wearing a wig, my mom’s lingerie, and some of her jewelry. I must have borrowed that skirt. The makeup is well balanced and effective, yet surprisingly subtle. I was probably wearing black and white striped stockings. Though duct tape pasties are little passé in 2021, I’ll give this late 2004/early 2005 look a grade A.
Photo taken in my bedroom before heading to a new all-ages goth club in ballard. Spoiler:it was boring.
Do: Though I’m tempted to call Don’t on this one for the heavy underage drinking involved, this was really a slick look to show off this clear vinyl dress that I sewed completely out of Pokemon Cards. I paired it 1960s-style with a white slip underneath and big white sunglasses, and topped it off with some clear plastic earrings. The punk bracelets don’t go, but I’m pretty sure I couldn't see 5” in front of my face when this photo was taken so I will let it slide.
Photo taken at an unofficial senior class party in my best friend’s basement, 2005..?
Do: Here’s an incredibly dressy look be climbing around in a public park at night. The scenario to which I wore this makes it a major Don’t. However, I didn’t have any concept at this age of how to keep my clothes in decent condition, which is why most of my outfits were generally sweat stained, snagged, and more or less rotting off my underweight body. But you really have to appreciate the use of color here. The pinks all match, and the purple color of my fishnets is unexpected to say the least. This is the exact hair that this outfit needs. Remember, the micromini was IN in 2005 and I clearly went for it full throttle– exposed garters and all.
Photo taken at Gasworks Park, Seattle 2005
Don’t Do: Okay I’m biased because I have always loved this joyful shot of me wearing a children's halloween costume with a bra on top, duct-taped bowling shoes, 50’s novelty glasses, and a Sprouse scarf with a wedding veil on my head, bouncing down the aisle of my local thrift store on a rubber ball. This outfit is SO WRONG that it actually crosses the threshold of awful and becomes great again. It’s practically editorial. It has my seal of approval. I figure– if you’re gonna go crazy, go craaaaazy.
Photo taken at Value Village Capitol Hill in Seattle, 2004
Do: My chlorine color hair aside, pairing eighties accessories with a 1920’s- inspired dress works surprisingly well. I wore this flapper Halloween costume on a weekly basis until it fell apart, after trading a girl at school a burned Shonen Knife CD for it. Remember burning CD’s? Anyway, I would nix the pearls and swap the dress out for something fringey with a bit more sophistication if I were to pull this look now, but for 16 years old before “fashion TikTok” was a thing, this look is a-okay.
Photo circa 2003
Do: Who knew neon green and Barney purple would compliment red hair so well? 18-year-old me, apparently. I had red braid extensions in here, and there’s that pesky white slip dress again. The letters on the scarf break up the blocks of color here. The side swept bangs put the earrings center stage. 8/10 for this fluorescent combo.
Picture circa 2005
Don’t: This was peak 15-year-old me during my Johnny Rotten phase, but this look borderlines “pop punk” too much to be taken seriously. My belt is far too clunky for my shapeless outfit, and the skirt is an awkwardly short length for such a boyish look. My necktie is both tied wrong and wrinkled, making me look like I showered in it, while also looking like I probably rarely showered (true). My hair is outgrown and doesn’t flatter my face or this silhouette. The look feels too obvious to be interesting, which is such a fatal flaw I see people make when they first get inspired by a specific fashion genre. This is the kind of image I can look back on and say “look how far I’ve come”, but it won't stop me from giving it a resounding DON’T.
Photo taken in my friends backyard 2003
